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Toolndie7

Joke of the day

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That 's funny..

After 3 yrs on Norco's for my torn shoulder it's taken about 5mos. to get past the constipation. There is a lot to be said for takin a good $hit....just an old man's 2 mags.:lmao:

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THE  5 ANSWERS WE HAVE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR!

Q: WHAT ARE THE SMALL BUMPS AROUND A WOMAN'S NIPPLES FOR?
A: It's Braille for "suck here".

Q: WHAT IS AN AUSTRALIAN KISS?
A: It's the same as a French kiss, but "down under".

Q: WHAT DO YOU DO WITH 365 USED CONDOMS?
A: Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.

Q: WHY WERE HURRICANES NORMALLY NAMED AFTER WOMEN?
A: Because when they come, they're wild and wet;  but when they go, they
  take your house and car with them..

Q: WHY DO GIRLS RUB THEIR EYES WHEN THEY GET UP IN THE MORNING?
A: Because they don't have balls to scratch.

BONUS QUESTION & ANSWER:
Q: What is a man's ultimate embarrassment?
A: Running into a wall with an erection and breaking his nose.

Nominated as the world's best short joke:
A three-year-old boy was examining his testicles while taking a bath.
"Mom," he asked, "Are these my brains?"
"Not yet," she replied.
 
 

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A guy walks into a bar sits down and tells the bartender "12 shots of your best whiskey, line em up!!"

The bartender replies " Look man, we got GOOD whiskeys here, you'e talking 30 bucks a shot!"

To which the guy replies "12 shots, POUR EM!!"

The bartender sets up 12 shot glasses and pours 12 shots.

The guy goes right down the line, boom, boom, boom...... Does all 12 shots.

The bartender looks at the guy and says "Damn! I'e NEVER seen anyone drink like that before!!"

The guy replies "If you had what I've got you'd drink like that!"

The bartender says "Oh no man, what do you have?"

The guy says "Six dollars!!!"

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