Sisco Posted September 25, 2014 Report Share Posted September 25, 2014 Read this, had to share: a good chuckle. I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track downterrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got thewhole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to takeus old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're atleast 35. For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a month, leaving usmore than 280,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy. Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a crankysoldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired andhungry.' We are bad-tempered and impatient, and maybe letting us kill someasshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us upfor a while.. An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guysalways get up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like I said, I'm tiredand can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanaticalson-of-a-bitch. If captured we couldn't spill the beansbecause we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial numberwould be a real brainteaser. Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to gettingscreamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed anappreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get outof the house, away from the screaming and yelling. They could lighten up on the obstacle course however... I've beenin combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side,nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training. Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too...I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet. An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's stilllearning to shave, to start a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn'tfigured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back ofhis head. These are all great reasons to keep our kidsat home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm'sway. Let us old guys track down those terrorists. The last thing anenemy would want to see is a couple millionpissed off old farts with bad attitudes and automatic weapons, who know thattheir best years are already behind them. HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50...in menopause!!! You thinkMEN have attitudes?? Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put them on border patrol.They'll have it secured the first night! Send this to all of your senior friends...it's in big type so theycan read it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armed Eye Doc Posted September 25, 2014 Report Share Posted September 25, 2014 LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
washguy Posted September 25, 2014 Report Share Posted September 25, 2014 where do I sign up? are the ruk sacks big enough to hold all my meds? :) Wash Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
survivalshop Posted September 25, 2014 Report Share Posted September 25, 2014 I used to want to go all over the world & have , but now , probably because I'm old , I'll wait for them to come to my side of the pond ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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