Bert had been having problems with his elbow and it was getting to the point where it was affecting his work at the construction site. His buddy Ernie asked him about it and Bert told him that he had been to several doctors and had even visited the Mayo Clinic, but no one could figure out what the problem was.
Ernie told Bert that he knew a doctor that could figure it out, and he was willing to bet $100 that he could. Bert figured he would make an easy $100 on that deal so he took Ernie up on it and got the doctor's name.
He scheduled an appointment and went to see the doc. After a thorough exam the doctor gave him a urine specimen cup and told him to drop off a sample of his urine the next morning on his way to work and he would have a diagnosis for by the time he got off work.
Now Bert had no intentions of loosing a $100 bet so when he got home and saw his dog Ole Blue with his leg hiked up by a tree he ran over and collected a bit of ole Blue's piss. He went in the house and put the cup by the toilet then kicked back with a cold one in front of the TV. A short time later his daughter came walking through and he asked her if she was going to the bathroom. She replied yes and he told her "Pee a little bit in that cup for me". A bit later his wife came through the living room and he made the same request of her. Later that night, before going to bed he added his contribution to the mix.
The next morning Bert dropped the urine off at the doctor's office on his way to work and told Ernie that he was pretty sure the doc wouldn't be able to tell him anything and he sure hoped Ernie had that hundred in his pocket.
On his way home Bert stopped back at the doctor's office, feeling pretty sure that the bet was won. The doctor called him into the examining room and told him to sit down, as he had some bad news.
Bert was thinking to himself "This should be interesting!"
The doc looked him in the eye and said "Bert, your dog has rabies, you're daughter has the clap, your wife is pregnant and if you don't quit masturbating you're going to loose that arm!" :ugone2far: