Jump to content
308AR.com Community
  • Visit Aero Precision
  • Visit Brownells
  • Visit EuroOptic
  • Visit Site
  • Visit Beachin Tactical
  • Visit Rainier Arms
  • Visit Ballistic Advantage
  • Visit Palmetto State Armory
  • Visit Cabelas
  • Visit Sportsmans Guide

brand new joke


MaDuce

Recommended Posts

Just thought of this one about 10 minutes ago while doing house chores. Mr. Robobot, you especially should like this one.

........

 

A criminal was running from police when he entered a plaza full of cars. Looking around, he spotted a Ferrari in the parking lot with an unsuspecting passenger and the keys in the ignition. Figuring he could outrun police in the unusually fast car, he hopped in and sped away.

 

 As soon as he entered the freeway, the passenger calmly pointed up and said, "You may be able to outrun those cop cars but you won't get away from the man up there."

 

 The criminal ignored him and kept speeding up and making risky maneuvers the cop cars couldn't match. Soon he started getting farther and farther ahead of the police. Then he yelled out, "YEAH!!! SMOKED EM!!" Then the passenger again calmly pointed up and said, "You may be able to outrun those cop cars but you won't get away from the man up there."

 

 The criminal yelled, "SHUT UP!!!" and kept speeding on. Soon he was in the clear and after not seeing a single cop car for several minutes, he casually pulled in to an abandoned plaza and exited the vehicle.

 

 Suddenly uniformed officers, SWAT guys and police dogs stormed in and surrounded him. He dove to the pavement and put his hands out screaming, "how in the world did they find me?" Just then the passenger calmly walked by, pointed at the police helicopter overhead and said, "I told you, you may be able to outrun those cop cars but you won't get away from the man up there."

Edited by MaDuce
Link to comment
Share on other sites

the getto bird will get you every time!!! actully i heard a story once from about a guy on a sport bike who had the cops chasing him for wheeling down the I. he was able to shake the cruisers but couldnt get away from the chopper so he went to the air port and was able to lose the chooper too. IDK how true it is but sounds reasonable, except the air port is normally crawling with LEO's of some sorts

Edited by shepp
Link to comment
Share on other sites

There was some inmate always talking about his customized rice-rocket. Someone commented about "You can't outrun the helicopter."

He just said "Man, those can't even go 150mph!"

Jon

Wow........... Well he wasn't in the Klink for being smart

Link to comment
Share on other sites

There was some inmate always talking about his customized rice-rocket.  Someone commented about "You can't outrun the helicopter."

 

He just said "Man, those can't even go 150mph!"

 

Jon

 

150mph down the interstate? Assuming you can even reach that speed (most modern super cars can only go around 200-220 on a good day with a perfectly straight track without having to swerve) it would be a miracle for you to come out of that in one piece (literally). I've seen cars crash at 100mph and the aftermath looks more like plain crashes, with nothing but debris scattered everywhere. And at 150mph, your car won't be able to maneuver the traffic around you if they're moving at freeway speed.

 

 So yeah, at 150mph, you'll avoid jail time. You'll be going to your funeral in stead.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

guy here hit a girl i went to school with at an estimated 129mph, he was on a honda CBR 929 she was in a ext. cab mid 90's 1/2 silverado. he impacted her in the drivers side door killing both of them and turning the truck on its side. she "pulled" out in from of him but the intersection she was at at the rate of speed he was traveling there was no way in hell she ever saw him coming.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sportbike, MaDuce.  Not a car.

 

This guy's "cameraman" - at two points in the vid - is going 270km/h and 290km/h, and the rider goes by him, in a wheelie, like he's sitting on the side of the road.

 

That's every bit of 200+mph, right there.

 

Edited by 98Z5V
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I've done 130 on my current motorcycle. The Honda 1300cc does it without even trying. The best I ever did on a BMW 1150 was about 120. that thing was gutless.

I did 140 in a patrol car (Ford Crown Vic). Lights and siren the whole way down the freeway in the middle of the night... I also did about 160 in a tricked out Mustang GT... But that was in a life before LE. ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I've had the speedo on my tlr up to 145 I'm guessing it was more like 130-135. Buddy of mine let me take his busa out all bolt on power no nos no turbo. Told me to take it to 90 and crack it I was doing 155 in no time, that thing was retarded.

That busa in that video is nasty, I doubt he's clutching up those wheelies that's all power. And pulling it up with power at over 120-140mph is super impressive!!! All this makes me miss my early 20's lol

Edited by shepp
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Motorcycles are a different story when it comes to top speed. They're also a different story when it comes to your chances of surviving a crash.

 

 Here's a good look at what happens when a corvette going 165mph mixes with vehicles obeying the speed limit. Remember what I said about looking like the aftermath of a plain crash.

 

BTW. Notice that the chopper is keeping up with him at 165.

 

 

 

Sportbike, MaDuce.  Not a car.

 

This guy's "cameraman" - at two points in the vid - is going 270km/h and 290km/h, and the rider goes by him, in a wheelie, like he's sitting on the side of the road.

 

That's every bit of 200+mph, right there.

 

 

 Now THAT'S what I call a suicycle. :banana:

Edited by MaDuce
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Damn rubber necker's!!!! Few years ago I was comeing home from the UP there was an exit for a rest stop between the Interstate and the exit there was a berm of snow about 15-20' high from the plows cleaning the exit and I. As we came closer I could see a dark spot atop that berm, it was a Chevy trail blazer, idk how the hell they got up there but it musta been a hell of a ride!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...