Armed Eye Doc

I copy them from another forum I'm on that has a well established thread.

The Cowboy A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand. Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk. He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well. Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, "You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels." The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night. One o'clock came, however, and he didn't return. Two o'clock, and no hired hand. He returned around two thirty, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him. She quietly called him over to her. "Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said. Trembling, he did as she directed. "Now take off my boots." He did as she asked, ever so slowly. "Now take off my socks." He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots. "Now take off my skirt." He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light. "Now take off my bra." Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor. "Now," she said, "take off my panties." By the light of the fire, he slowly pulled them down and off. Then she looked at him and said, "If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you're fired!"

I see lots of people that I think "there's no way we're the same age." Some look better but most look a lot older. <laughs>

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN GUILTY OF LOOKING AT OTHERS YOUR OWN AGE AND THINKING, 'SURELY I CAN'T LOOK THAT OLD. WELL.. YOU'LL LOVE THIS ONE. MY NAME IS ALICE SMITH AND I WAS SITTING IN THE WAITING ROOM FOR MY FIRST APPOINTMENT WITH A NEW DENTIST. I NOTICED HIS DDS DIPLOMA, WHICH BORE HIS FULL NAME. SUDDENLY, I REMEMBERED A TALL, HANDSOME, DARK-HAIRED BOY WITH THE SAME NAME HAD BEEN IN MY HIGH SCHOOL CLASS SOME 40-ODD YEARS AGO. COULD HE BE THE SAME GUY THAT I HAD A SECRET CRUSH ON, WAY BACK THEN? UPON SEEING HIM, HOWEVER, I QUICKLY DISCARDED ANY SUCH THOUGHT. THIS BALDING, GRAY-HAIRED MAN WITH THE DEEPLY LINED FACE WAS WAY TOO OLD TO HAVE BEEN MY CLASSMATE. AFTER HE EXAMINED MY TEETH, I ASKED HIM IF HE HAD ATTENDED MORGAN PARK HIGH SCHOOL. "YES. YES, I DID. I'M A MUSTANG," HE GLEAMED WITH PRIDE. "WHEN DID Y OU GRADUATE?" I ASK ED. HE ANSWERED "IN 1959.WHY DO YOU ASK?" "YOU WERE IN MY CLASS!" I EXCLAIMED. HE LOOKED AT ME CLOSELY. THEN, THAT UGLY, OLD, BALD, WRINKLED, FAT ASS, GRAY-HAIRED, DECREPIT SON-OF-A-BITCH ASKED "WHAT DID YOU TEACH?"

Ouch! That hurts just hearing about it. I hope you heal quickly.

An elderly couple just learned how to send text messages on their cell phones. The wife was a romantic type and the husband was more of a no-nonsense guy. One afternoon the wife went out to meet a friend for coffee. She decided to send her husband a romantic text message and she wrote: "If you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you." The husband texted back to her: "I'm on the toilet. Please advise."

I happened by the powder department and saw a small selection today. There was a couple of pounds of 4-5 different rifle powders. Not a big selection, but still the first I have seen there since March. It would be worth a look if you are nearby and need some powder.

Welcome to the party. Are New Yorkers allowed to join a gun forum on the internet anymore? <dontknow> <laughs>

My first thought was that it was not botched. He's dead and that was the objective. He just got a little more (deserved) punishment.

Shouldn't that go in the Grilling thread?

I don't know if this qualifies as badass or not, but is available until midnight central time. http://www.woot.com/offers/dji-phantom-fc40-uav-drone-quadcopter?ref=cnt_dly_img

I stole this from another site.

Welcome from Texas

Welcome from Texas P2B. There is much info to be found here on the differences between manufacturers. There are also plenty of people here who are more than happy to help you spend your money to get the exact rifle components that you didn't know you needed. <laughs>

That's a nice looking range.

I think a lot of teens these days need this.

Am I the only one reading smurf's posts with a NZ accent?

If those are your toys, I don't want to know what you have for "tools." :hail: Nice toys though.

That looks like a good site, but I'm not so sure. They accepted me as a member pretty quick. :))

Welcome from Texas! I love my LAR-8. I waited a long time for mine, but I went through a good friend/ local dealer and was willing to wait for what I got. There are many RRA's to be had if you look at gun shows, larger stores or online. You have to be willing to take what is there and make it your own.

<lmao>

Welcome from Texas

Congrats on the new baby. I hope all will remain healthy and will get to go home soon.

This is similar search engine to gunbot. http://ammoseek.com/ammo/308-winchester