mrmackc Posted December 20, 2016 Report Posted December 20, 2016 3 hours ago, washguy said: Try this one on for size Wash For those of you who think you may have Alzheimers... The School of Psychology, University of Pennsylvania conducted a survey called “What really do you see?” People were asked to focus their attention on this simple picture and then asked if they had noticed anything odd. Now you also have a chance to test your skills and see if you can pass………Study the picture for 5 seconds. What did you notice? Here are the Results of the Survey: 1. 100% of males failed this test. They were distracted by the woman’s large bosom. 2. 100% of the females also failed this test. They were distracted by the wide choice of doughnuts. The real answer (see below): . . . . . There’s a mouse on one of the doughnuts……..now don’t tell me you saw it. I won’t believe you. Alzheimer’s, you ask? Could be
mrmackc Posted December 22, 2016 Report Posted December 22, 2016 Trump joke: MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN….. A large earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale hit the Middle East. Two million Muslims died and over a million were injured. Iraq, Iran and Syria were totally ruined and the governments asked for help to rebuild. The rest of the world was in shock. Great Britain sent troops to help keep the peace. Saudi Arabia sent oil and monetary assistance. Latin American countries sent clothing. New Zealand and Australia sent sheep, cattle and food crops. The Asian countries sent labor to assist in rebuilding the infrastructure. Canada sent medical teams and supplies. The new American President, Donald Trump, not to be outdone, sent two million replacement Muslims. God Bless President Trump!
MikedaddyH Posted December 22, 2016 Report Posted December 22, 2016 10 minutes ago, mrmackc said: Trump joke: MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN….. A large earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale hit the Middle East. Two million Muslims died and over a million were injured. Iraq, Iran and Syria were totally ruined and the governments asked for help to rebuild. The rest of the world was in shock. Great Britain sent troops to help keep the peace. Saudi Arabia sent oil and monetary assistance. Latin American countries sent clothing. New Zealand and Australia sent sheep, cattle and food crops. The Asian countries sent labor to assist in rebuilding the infrastructure. Canada sent medical teams and supplies. The new American President, Donald Trump, not to be outdone, sent two million replacement Muslims. God Bless President Trump! ?
suzukiray Posted December 25, 2016 Report Posted December 25, 2016 I went to buy some condoms last week. The checker asked if I wanted a bag. I told her No, the girl wasn't that ugly. Ray.
MikedaddyH Posted December 25, 2016 Report Posted December 25, 2016 6 hours ago, suzukiray said: I went to buy some condoms last week. The checker asked if I wanted a bag. I told her No, the girl wasn't that ugly. Ray.
mrmackc Posted January 3, 2017 Report Posted January 3, 2017 A young man goes into a drugstore to buy condoms. The pharmacist says the condoms come in packs of 3, 9 or 12 and asks which the young man wants. “Well,” he said, “I’ve been seeing this girl for a while and she’s really hot. I want the condoms because I think tonight’s “the” night. We’re having dinner with her parents, and then we’re going out. And I’ve got a feeling I’m gonna get lucky after that. Once she’s had me, she’ll want me all the time, so you’d better give me the 12 pack.” The young man makes his purchase and leaves. Later that evening, he sits down to dinner with his girlfriend and her parent’s. He asks if he might give the blessing, and they agree. He begins the prayer, but continues praying for several minutes. The girl leans over and says, “You never told me that you were such a religious person.” He leans over to her and whispers, “You never told me that your father is a pharmacist.”
MikedaddyH Posted January 4, 2017 Report Posted January 4, 2017 9 hours ago, mrmackc said: It takes 6 boys to get him off ! Lol !
planeflyer21 Posted January 4, 2017 Report Posted January 4, 2017 15 minutes ago, MikedaddyH said: It takes 6 boys to get him off ! Lol ! Wait. Are we talking about Podesta?
MikedaddyH Posted January 4, 2017 Report Posted January 4, 2017 11 minutes ago, planeflyer21 said: Wait. Are we talking about Podesta? Podesta fist balls ?
mrmackc Posted January 5, 2017 Report Posted January 5, 2017 (edited) Edited January 5, 2017 by mrmackc
unforgiven Posted January 7, 2017 Report Posted January 7, 2017 Little Johnny wanted to but some rubbers,Walks into a drug store and see a women behind the counter. Walks on over all embarrassed,face red. Lady said "what can I help you with?" Johnny said " I need some rubbers" . What size ? She said. Size??? I don't know... She said "you see that fence out back with the knot holes" stick your penis in a hole and come back and let me know which fits best. Johnny comes back a half hour later and the women said " well what will it be ??" Johnny said " forget about those rubbers, I'll take 10 feet of that fence".
planeflyer21 Posted January 7, 2017 Report Posted January 7, 2017 /\/\/\/\ So that's where the term "morning wood" came from.
Armed Eye Doc Posted January 10, 2017 Report Posted January 10, 2017 A patient told me this one. Why does a male dog lick himself? Because he can't make a fist.
mrmackc Posted January 10, 2017 Report Posted January 10, 2017 15 minutes ago, Armed Eye Doc said: A patient told me this one. Why does a male dog lick himself? Because he can't make a fist. Good one IDoc, I never thought of it that way, could be, or...maybe just because he can!
MikedaddyH Posted January 10, 2017 Report Posted January 10, 2017 7 hours ago, Armed Eye Doc said: A patient told me this one. Why does a male dog lick himself? Because he can't make a fist. This one is for you doc.
Armed Eye Doc Posted January 11, 2017 Report Posted January 11, 2017 46 minutes ago, MikedaddyH said: This one is for you doc. Lol
Armed Eye Doc Posted January 11, 2017 Report Posted January 11, 2017 A recent article in the West Australian newspaper reported that a woman, Mrs Maynard, has sued a Perth Hospital, saying that after her husband had surgery there, he lost all interest in sex. A hospital spokesman replied: "Mr. Maynard was admitted for cataract surgery. All we did was correct his eyesight."
jtallen83 Posted January 11, 2017 Report Posted January 11, 2017 20 minutes ago, Armed Eye Doc said: A recent article in the West Australian newspaper reported that a woman, Mrs Maynard, has sued a Perth Hospital, saying that after her husband had surgery there, he lost all interest in sex. A hospital spokesman replied: "Mr. Maynard was admitted for cataract surgery. All we did was correct his eyesight."
392heminut Posted January 11, 2017 Report Posted January 11, 2017 8 hours ago, Armed Eye Doc said: A patient told me this one. Why does a male dog lick himself? Because he can't make a fist. Yup, dogs don't have thumbs!
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