mrmackc Posted May 14, 2016 Report Share Posted May 14, 2016 This is a very serious JOKE: A doctor from France says: “In France, the medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man's testicles; we put them into another man, and in 6 weeks he is looking for work." A German doctor comments quietly: "That's nothing, in Germany we take part of the brain out of a person; we put it into another person head, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work." A Russian doctor says boasting: "That's nothing either. In Russia we take out half of the heart from a person; we put it into another person's chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for work." The U.S. doctor laughs and answers loudly immediately: "That's nothing my colleagues, you are way behind us....in the USA , about 7 years ago, we grabbed a person from Kenya with no brains, no heart, and no balls....we made him President of the United States, and now....... the whole damn country is looking for work." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikedaddyH Posted May 17, 2016 Report Share Posted May 17, 2016 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robocop1051 Posted May 18, 2016 Report Share Posted May 18, 2016 An oldie but goodie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrmackc Posted May 23, 2016 Report Share Posted May 23, 2016 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unforgiven Posted May 28, 2016 Report Share Posted May 28, 2016 Now that was funny as hell. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EngrBob Posted June 6, 2016 Report Share Posted June 6, 2016 LAST WORDS: I don't know whether or not you watched the memorial service for Ronald Reagan, but if you did, you probably noticed that Bill and Hillary were both dozing off. President Ronald Reagan, who never missed a chance for a good one-liner, raised his head out of his casket and said . . . . . "I see the Clintons are finally sleeping together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrmackc Posted June 9, 2016 Report Share Posted June 9, 2016 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jtallen83 Posted June 9, 2016 Report Share Posted June 9, 2016 TPB, hell yes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
survivalshop Posted June 16, 2016 Report Share Posted June 16, 2016 In Chaos Theory, the "butterfly effect” is the name given to the sensitive connection between initial conditions in which an insignificant event in one state in non-linear systems, can result in sometimes catastrophic events in the universal state. Show original message In other words, although unlikely, it is possible for a butterfly flapping its wings in Texas to cause a typhoon in the Japanese Sea. Case in point, in mid-20th Century America, a loose18-year-old hippie female in a Honolulu college had sex with an older, alcoholic Kenyan man on a student visa, who had a wife and child back in Africa. And this less than significant event started the collapse and dissolution of the United States of America. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EngrBob Posted June 16, 2016 Report Share Posted June 16, 2016 20 minutes ago, survivalshop said: In Chaos Theory, the "butterfly effect” is the name given to the sensitive connection between initial conditions in which an insignificant event in one state in non-linear systems, can result in sometimes catastrophic events in the universal state. Show original message In other words, although unlikely, it is possible for a butterfly flapping its wings in Texas to cause a typhoon in the Japanese Sea. Case in point, in mid-20th Century America, a loose18-year-old hippie female in a Honolulu college had sex with an older, alcoholic Kenyan man on a student visa, who had a wife and child back in Africa. And this less than significant event started the collapse and dissolution of the United States of America. That really isn't funny! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubbas4570 Posted June 19, 2016 Report Share Posted June 19, 2016 On 06/16/2016 at 0:44 PM, survivalshop said: In Chaos Theory, the "butterfly effect” is the name given to the sensitive connection between initial conditions in which an insignificant event in one state in non-linear systems, can result in sometimes catastrophic events in the universal state. Show original message In other words, although unlikely, it is possible for a butterfly flapping its wings in Texas to cause a typhoon in the Japanese Sea. Case in point, in mid-20th Century America, a loose18-year-old hippie female in a Honolulu college had sex with an older, alcoholic Kenyan man on a student visa, who had a wife and child back in Africa. And this less than significant event started the collapse and dissolution of the United States of America. Perfect rendering of that theory, at least for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sisco Posted August 28, 2016 Report Share Posted August 28, 2016 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
planeflyer21 Posted September 2, 2016 Report Share Posted September 2, 2016 My daughter asked "Why do they name hurricanes?" "I don't know. Maybe it makes them feel good about the storm," I replied. "I think they should name one after Harambe the gorilla. That would make him happy." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikedaddyH Posted September 2, 2016 Report Share Posted September 2, 2016 7 hours ago, planeflyer21 said: My daughter asked "Why do they name hurricanes?" "I don't know. Maybe it makes them feel good about the storm," I replied. "I think they should name one after Harambe the gorilla. That would make him happy." They should name them after ex wives and ex husbands because they suck the life out of you and piss everywhere and tear up your house !!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rsquared Posted September 3, 2016 Report Share Posted September 3, 2016 13 hours ago, MikedaddyH said: They should name them after ex wives and ex husbands because they suck the life out of you and piss everywhere and tear up your house !!! Now THAT's fukin funny! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armed Eye Doc Posted September 9, 2016 Report Share Posted September 9, 2016 GRAMPA -WHAT IS COUPLE SEX? Make sure that you understand the question first.... All you Grandpas and Grandmas, This was too funny not to forward. We are all reaching that stage where we need to keep the wax out of our ears and our hearing aids tuned up. (Some of us anyway!) Enjoy! A 6-year-old girl went to her grandfather, who was working in the yard and asked him, "Grampa, what is a couple sex? The grandfather was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decided that if she's old enough to know to ask the question then she's old enough to get a straight answer. Steeling himself to leave nothing out, he proceeded to tell her all about human reproduction and the joys and responsibilities that go along with it. When he finished explaining, the little girl was looking at him with her mouth hanging open, eyes wide in amazement. Seeing the look on her face, the grandfather asked her, "Why did you ask this question, honey? The little girl replied, "Well, Grandma says to tell you that dinner will be ready in “Just a couple secs”. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sketch Posted September 10, 2016 Report Share Posted September 10, 2016 Yep haha? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unforgiven Posted September 10, 2016 Report Share Posted September 10, 2016 Ooopsie... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
george_995 Posted September 20, 2016 Report Share Posted September 20, 2016 What's difference between an illegal alien and ET? ET learned English and wanted to go home! ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
planeflyer21 Posted September 20, 2016 Report Share Posted September 20, 2016 /\/\/\/\ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sketch Posted September 21, 2016 Report Share Posted September 21, 2016 +1? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armed Eye Doc Posted September 21, 2016 Report Share Posted September 21, 2016 HILLARY'S FIRST NIGHT AS PRESIDENT Hillary Clinton was sworn in today as President. She has disposed of Bill and is spending her first night alone in the White House. She has waited several years for this!! FIRST NIGHT Suddenly! The ghost of George Washington appears to her, and Hillary says, "How can I best serve my country?" Washington says, "Never tell a lie." "Ouch!" says Hillary, "I don't know about that." SECOND NIGHT The next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson appears...? Hillary says, "How can I best serve my country?" Jefferson says, "Listen to the people." "Ohhh! I really really don't want to do that." THIRD NIGHT On the third night, the ghost of Abraham Lincoln appears...? Hillary says, "How can I best serve my country?" Lincoln says,"Go to the theater." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
planeflyer21 Posted September 22, 2016 Report Share Posted September 22, 2016 /\/\/\/\ Funny stuff. My money's on her being a drooling idiot from a serious "event" well before January 20, 2017. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armed Eye Doc Posted September 30, 2016 Report Share Posted September 30, 2016 A cure for homesickness At The Villages in Florida last week, there was a bumper sticker on a parked car that read: "I miss Chicago." Someone broke the window, stole the radio, shot out all four of the tires, stuck on a Hillary bumper sticker and left a note that read: "Hope this helps" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sketch Posted October 1, 2016 Report Share Posted October 1, 2016 Hehehe!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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