Matt.Cross Posted April 3, 2017 Report Share Posted April 3, 2017 Alright you slack-jawed faggots, pull up a chair, crack open a cold beverage, and take in the awesomeness that was the 2017 Spring Shootfest. This story begins on Thursday night, after heading home from work, final checking my gear and luggage and a good shag to tide me over for the weekend. I set my alarm for 0400 and fall asleep at about 0100. Had an awful nightmare, dreamed I boarded the plane and as they are pushing away from the gate, Ron's gravelly voice comes over the intercom; "Ladies and gentlemen and those of you fucked up bastards who aren't sure of what you are, thank you for flying R-Squared Airlines. We're pushing back from the gate now and are waiting for approval for takeoff, should give me just enough time to open this MGD and have a cigarette before we get this beast rolling. In the meantime, sit back and relax to the soothing sounds of my Count Basie playlist, which we'll be enjoying for the remainder of this 4 hour flight. If you have any comments, issues, or concerns, please STFU and keep it to yourdamnself. Thank you again and on behalf of R-Squared Airlines, enjoy your flight!". My alarm blared, ripping me from the nightmare, shaking and in a cold sweat. I got up and made tracks for the airport. To be continued.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
98Z5V Posted April 3, 2017 Report Share Posted April 3, 2017 Ooooohh, this is gonna be good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikedaddyH Posted April 3, 2017 Report Share Posted April 3, 2017 Déjà vu !!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
392heminut Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 Bwahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt.Cross Posted April 4, 2017 Author Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 Friday, March 31st - 0500 Charlotte International Airport I arrived at the airport and encountered my first logistical challenge of the trip. I located a parking space in the extremely packed long term parking, but there were cars closely parked on either side, and my big-ass pelican case is in the rear seat of my truck cab. How to remove my case becomes the first challenge. I resolve it by removing the case first, and then pulling into my parking spot. Problem solved, so far so good. The airport shuttle shows up and I embark, ignoring stares from sheeple types alarmed by the presence of luggage that clearly indicates that the owner isn't a common desk jockey. Walking into the airport, I was immediately greeted as I approached the American Airlines ticket counter by a very nice smiling black lady who very loudly asked for all the sheeple in line to hear, "DO YOU HAVE FIREARMS?" as she points at the Pelican case. Hot diggity, a fellow enthusiast! I grinned ear to ear and replied equally loudly, "YES MAAM!". She then adopted an indoor appropriate voice and kindly pointed me to a specific service desk and said helpfully, "Over there.", virtually eliminating any chance of error on my part. Things progressed smoothly at the ticket counter, the agent actually thanked me very politely for having an itemized list of declared firearms. She had me sign to confirm that they were unloaded, printed my claim receipts, and called the TSA Inspector over to be escorted to the TSA examination area. I followed the TSA guy to an Employee Access Only area, feeling smugly rebellious that I'm not TSA. I was asked to unlock the Pelican case and not touch any of the firearms. I helped the TSA agent remove the upper layers of foam, and when he had verified all the declared items, he casually asked me about my occupation as we replaced the upper layers of foam and restored the case to it's prior condition. I told him I was a civilian headed to a training event and he seemed satisfied. Reflecting on these events, I wish I had informed him that information is classified, and asked him how far his security clearance went. Anyways, I escorted the TSA agent back to the ticket counter, where I witnessed as he loaded the case onto the luggage belt. I shook his hand and thanked him for explaining what I could expect in the future, this being my first time flying with firearms, and headed towards the TSA Pre-Check line, which is a massive time saver BTW. 0530 hours - I arrive at the gate, only have to wait two more hours to takeoff. 0700 hours - Boarding begins. Flight shows on time to depart at 0730. 0730 hours - The pilot comes over the intercom, thankfully he sounds nothing like Ron. I'm so relieved I don't even sweat an hour delay for shifting weather patterns. 0820 hours - The plane pushes away from the gate, takeoff is executed at 0830. Operation Desert Tempest has begun! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sketch Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 That's a good report for tsa... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DNP Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 Really regretting you had pre-lubed for the cavity search at this point...weren't ya? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt.Cross Posted April 4, 2017 Author Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 4 minutes ago, DNP said: Really regretting you had pre-lubed for the cavity search at this point...weren't ya? *clears throat and looks at script* *nervously* No... Unlike other commercial products, Rat-a-Tat doesn't cause irritation or personal discomfort. It's enduring lubricative quality will leave you feeling soothed and comfortable for far longer than competing products. *hesitates uncomfortably* None of that unpleasant..... warming... ...and... dripping. *glances up nervously and swallows* *looks at script again* Please see your nearest Justice Brothers representative for more information on this and other quality lubricants today. *looks up and smiles nervously as shot fades* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armed Eye Doc Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 Lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubbas4570 Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sisco Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt.Cross Posted April 5, 2017 Author Report Share Posted April 5, 2017 ~1300 hours mission time (10:00 MST) I land in Phoenix, none the worse for wear, text Tom and let him know I'm on the ground. He replies with the exfiltration plan once my gear is recovered. 1330 hours - After switching baggage reclaim carousels without the airline informing us, I retrieve my suitcase from the carousel and await the arrival of my Pelican case. It doesn't show. I text Tom. 1345 hours - I locate the AA baggage claim office, they have my case. I am informed that declared firearms usually are marked for pickup at the airline baggage claim office. Would've been nice to know that ahead of time, but I've got my gear now and it's all there. 1350 hours - Having arranged with Tom to be picked up near the originally indicated baggage claim, there is a comical exchange of frantic texts and phone calls as I try to determine which door in the terminal Tom should pick me up at. I end up running down the sidewalk chasing him as he heads to the door I have incorrectly directed him to. 1400 hours - Tom and I depart Phoenix Sky Harbor International and head towards Casa de Tacticat to commence logistical operations. Desert Tempest is rapidly becoming a viable undertaking, despite minor setbacks. 1430 hours - We are greeted at Casa de Tacticat by no other than the proprietor himself, Mr. Tacticat! He gets a rub from Tom, gives me an evil stare and a hiss. I laugh and offer him my hand to smell, he swats it disdainfully and walks away. 1445 hours - Tom and myself roll out to the RV storage unit to retrieve the Mobile Operations Command Center. It's hooked up and rolling in record time. 1530 (12:30 MST) - Mike, Matt (Justice Brothers Rep) and friend John, Tom, and myself commence loading the MOCC with the requisite supplies and gear for the imminent critical phase of Operation Desert Tempest. Gear is checked, and double checked. The all clear is given, and the crew goes mobile. The AO awaits! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
98Z5V Posted April 5, 2017 Report Share Posted April 5, 2017 The suspense is KILLING ME!!!... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt.Cross Posted April 5, 2017 Author Report Share Posted April 5, 2017 14 hours ago, 98Z5V said: The suspense is KILLING ME!!!... Really? You were there for all the rest... Well.... Except for the return flight, that is...!!! *dramatic music* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
98Z5V Posted April 5, 2017 Report Share Posted April 5, 2017 Your story-telling, you idgit! I can't wait 'til you get to the almost-armed-invasion of the camp! But, I have to wait for everything BEFORE that... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikedaddyH Posted April 5, 2017 Report Share Posted April 5, 2017 8 hours ago, 98Z5V said: Your story-telling, you idgit! I can't wait 'til you get to the almost-armed-invasion of the camp! But, I have to wait for everything BEFORE that... No $hit ! That's going to be chapter nine. Still have the white feather challenge and I haven't sent him the pics or video. The chicken hawk and the night shooting before the A$$clowns in the cyclops truck with the spotlight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
392heminut Posted April 5, 2017 Report Share Posted April 5, 2017 This is starting out pretty good! For those who don't already know, I was fighting nasty crosswinds on I-10 trying to get to Maricopa while all this was going on. Halfway there my wife calls and tells me I got out just in time, they shut the interstate down after I left! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shepp Posted April 5, 2017 Report Share Posted April 5, 2017 1 hour ago, 392heminut said: This is starting out pretty good! For those who don't already know, I was fighting nasty crosswinds on I-10 trying to get to Maricopa while all this was going on. Halfway there my wife calls and tells me I got out just in time, they shut the interstate down after I left! Because of the wind?!? Holy shit!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rsquared Posted April 5, 2017 Report Share Posted April 5, 2017 This is all sounding mighty interesting. Well Matt? Out with it man, for crying out loud. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt.Cross Posted April 5, 2017 Author Report Share Posted April 5, 2017 5 minutes ago, Rsquared said: This is all sounding mighty interesting. Well Matt? Out with it man, for crying out loud. Hold up there Hemingway, you of all people know you can't rush a good story! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
98Z5V Posted April 5, 2017 Report Share Posted April 5, 2017 21 minutes ago, Matt.Cross said: Hold up there Hemingway... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rsquared Posted April 5, 2017 Report Share Posted April 5, 2017 3 hours ago, Matt.Cross said: Hold up there Hemingway, you of all people know you can't rush a good story! True, but mine are "fictional" action stories that are thought up to be told in the multi-part format. Mini-series style. Now you've got actual "boots on the ground" fox-style reporting to do, my good man. And after action reports should be complete yet concise. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt.Cross Posted April 5, 2017 Author Report Share Posted April 5, 2017 1 minute ago, Rsquared said: True, but mine are "fictional" action stories that are thought up to be told in the multi-part format. Mini-series style. Now you've got actual "boots on the ground" fox-style reporting to do, my good man. And after action reports should be complete yet concise. Well, as usual you are correct. However, I am a working man and some concessions are going to have to be made in order to supply the detail this report deserves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rsquared Posted April 5, 2017 Report Share Posted April 5, 2017 I totally understand that my man. We'll take em as they trickle out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
392heminut Posted April 6, 2017 Report Share Posted April 6, 2017 4 hours ago, shepp said: Because of the wind?!? Holy poop!!! Pretty common here in the spring Shepp, it's because of the dust, not the wind velocities. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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